by: Jean Samick
Giving your sex life a boost doesn’t necessarily mean busting out the whips and chains and enrolling you and a partner in bondage classes. Sex is more about intercourse, it’s also about intimacy and relieving a little tension. So what better way to be intimate, relaxed and also sneak some foreplay in? Bedroom massage.
Massage in the bedroom can manifest in a few different ways. Maybe you and your partner need a chaperone on your journey to relaxville, so a partner massage could be a great way to get comfortable with the process. By having a masseuse lead the way through not only the act of rubbing down your muscles, but putting you in the frame of mind and physical setting to relax your mind as well as body, can be helpful in giving you pointers on how to do it back at home. Dimming the lights, putting on some calming music and warming up the room are all good practices to adapt. Nothing will snap you out of zen-land faster than being cold, hearing your neighbours TV or being able to see that crack in the ceiling you keep trying to forget about. This time is for you and your partner, so block out the rest of the world just as you would in a spa. That means no phones!
When you get to the actual massage part, remember to include the whole body in your saucy exploration. Don’t just stick to the back and shoulders, massage out each leg from thigh to calf to feet. Intertwine your fingers with theirs toes and hands to increase the blood flow, and alternate pressure and methods of rubbing to do the same through the muscles. Get your fingers into their hair (length permitting) and run your fingertips gentle over their scalp, just like at the hairdresser. Explore every inch of their body and re-familiarize yourself with your partner. Increasing the circulation through your partners body will make them more sensitive to your touch and enhance the feeling of the massage.
Alright, so what do you need for supplies? It depends how fancy you want to get, but at the bare minimum you probably want some lotion or baby oil so you don’t end up rubbing your partner raw. You want enough of a barrier between their skin that your hands can slide easily over their body, but without creating a messy lotion puddle beneath them. Imagine you’re moisturizing your partners skin very slowly, and ration out what you need per area of the body instead of trying to cover it all at once. After that, it’s all up to your personal comfort. Scented candles provide a nice smell and appropriately dimmed light, and you can get fancy oils or blindfolds but it’s all up to your personal exploration. Having a soft firm surface to lay on with a light sheet or blanket nearby will also keep your partner at maximum comfort.
It’s ok to laugh a little while you and your partner are finding your footing so to speak. Massage in the bedroom might seem a bit corny, or like something reserved for people too prudish to get crazy, but in fact it’s the opposite. The slow and methodic rhythm to massage is a slow and teasing sort of foreplay that can be drawn out as long as you wish. You and your partner could hit a frenzy by the time you’re done both legs, or you could draw things out while you switch roles as masseuse. Just be careful not to fall asleep before the fun!
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