The Erotic Art of Spanking

Erotic spanking is the act of a person slapping a partner with an open hand or an object to heighten sexual arousal. Whether it’s a light love tap on the buttocks when aroused or a heavier smack with a hostile edge, most people have experimented with erotic spanking in the bedroom. In fact, research from sex toy company LELO found that no less than 84% of people have tried this sex practice. For many, it’s their first step into the world of kink or BDSM. Its popularity likely stems from the fact that it can be performed without a great deal of pre-play preparation. Our bare asses have the ability to sustain a remarkable amount of swats. This month, we’re dedicating our blog to helping you and/or partner(s) achieve a happy, cherry-red ass!


Where did spanking come from?

Some people, depending on their age, may have memories of being spanked as a child. It was a common form of discipline for children in North America until the late 80s, and was culturally phased out beginning in the 90s. Though spanking has a long history as a form of punishment, its origins are actually quite different. The earliest practice of spanking stems from Ancient Greece where Pagan priests spanked women to increase fertility. But, how long have people been spanking each other for pleasure? The earliest depiction of this is the Tomb of the Whipping in Italy, dating back to the fifth century B.C. The tomb features a painting depicting two men in the act of flogging a woman where one of the men is receiving fellatio from the woman at the same time. So, we know for sure that erotic spanking as been around at least 2500 years!


Why do we find erotic spanking pleasurable?

There are both physical and psychological reasons to be attracted to spanking as a sex act. Physically, we know that spanking increases blood flow to the butt and pelvic region to encourage arousal. When the sensation is strong enough, it can travel to stimulate the genitals of the person struck. We also know that the impact of spanking stimulates nerves that transmit pain. Those of us with a sadomasochist streak actually enjoy the endorphin rush that comes with pain. Some folks like the tingly and warm sensation that comes after a spanking. Then there are the psychological benefits. Some people are into it as a mode of discipline in sex for a submissive/dominant power relationship. There are those who use it as an opportunity to work through and conquer trauma that causes them shame, embarrassment, or humiliation. Experiencing a spanking can also be a way to release tension and complete our body’s stress cycle response. Overall, different people enjoy spanking for different reasons, and they are all valid as long as it’s consensual.


Where do I start if I want to introduce spanking to my sex life?

First and foremost, pick a partner with whom you have a good emotional connection to explore this sex practice with. Whenever you want to try something new with a partner you should start with a conversation. Speak about this sex act in detail so that expectations are made clear. Here are some suggestions of what to include in the discussion:

  • Environment: It’s always wise to consider what kind of space would ensure your emotionally safety, especially since certain sex acts can trigger trauma for some. What would a safe environment for spanking look like for you and your partner(s)? 
  • Safe-word: Establish a safe word or non-verbal signal for the receiver to use to communicate their comfort levels while being spanked. It’s a good idea to have one safe word for toning things down and another for stopping play entirely. 
  • Clothing: Do you want skin on skin contact or do you want a clothing buffer? Skin on skin will provide a sharper and more intense sensation. If you’re new to spanking, consider starting with bottoms on (e.g., pants, skirt, undies, etc.) before going bare ass. 

Erotic Spanking Techniques and Additional Considerations 




Erotic spanking can be done in many different positions either during sex or as part of foreplay. A common position is over the knee spanking. This is when someone is being striked while being over the spanker’s knee. In this position, the spanker is sitting upright with their feet flat on the floor. The spankee is face down over their lap, with their upper body on one side of the spanker’s legs. You can also have the spankee bent over furniture, like a bed or sofa, or lying face down with their butt exposed. Whatever position you choose, try to keep your surrounding area clear as spanking can result in a lot of jolting and thrashing around. 


In the world of erotic spanking, you have stingy and thuddy sensations. A stingy pain is sharp with a sparkly after-sensation of warmth. The humble hand is really the ideal tool for this! A quick slap of a bare ass with a bare hand will deliver a delicious sting. The trick is to keep your fingers together and use a good amount of speed with your swat. It's worth noting that stingy hits cause more surface skin damage compared to the impact of a thud. Folks who prefer a thuddier spanking sensation should opt for paddling or flogging. A thuddier sensation requires more mass to produce a firm impact that can be described as a punch effect. A kick, for instance, would produce a thuddier pain. In the same way, a flogger or large paddle will spread the force of impact over a broader area. It’s important to consider that the spanker is able to receive better feedback with their hand compared to an external object, allowing them to better feel how hard they’re hitting someone. For this reason, it’s wise to start lightly with the hand and progress onto using accessories. 


Before you dive into a spanking session, warm up that booty! Give it some attention by rubbing it, kissing it, biting it, etc. Make sure the spankee is aroused before starting to spank. When it’s time, you’ll have to pick placement for the spanks. The most common place for erotic spanking is the bum. Here’s some tips on the best technique for this:

  • Aim for the fleshy part, avoiding the side
  • Use an upward motion
  • Curve the hand to the shape of the buttock so that the entire palm contacts the skin at the same time
  • Relax the wrist so the hand is flexible rather than rigid to prevent the hand from injury

Another popular place to spank is the thigh region. If you are gentle, you can also try spanking the upper back or breasts. Areas to avoid injury are lower back, neck, face or joints. For the more advanced erotic spankers, you can experiment with the soles of the feet, the chest, and the genitals. 


If the same spot is spanked over and over, then a bruise can appear. Although not everyone desires them, some BDSM practitioners are fond of bruises. If you’d like to avoid bruising, then variation is key. Don’t hit the same spot over and over again, rotate instead. It’s best to start off with a light tap and increase gradually. After a spank, rub the area that has been spanked to give some relief and to play up the teasing, mind-fuck element. It’s fun to build up the anticipation for the next smack! 


With all this in mind, you are equipped to explore erotic spanking safely and soundly! Go forth my feverish friends! 


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